He was tall, dark and handsome… So yet again I let you delve into my life. Mum, my mum introduced me to his mum. His mum and my mum happened to be so much alike after I got to know her. Brown skin, strict disciplinarians, very beautiful hair, opinionated, spiritual etc We cultivated our friendship […]
Hey I like you. I really like you. I want you, you want someone else, someone else wants me… So yours truly Andy Young one of the best deejays and co-host around campus told me one thing, “Ella, never stick to your lane!” I did not understand why he was saying this but now it […]
The story of an unconventional retirement: Don and Alison sold their car and apartment, gave away all their possessions, and headed out to see the world — they’re roughly 27 countries in, and counting.
You can make anything of your mood, so make it one of positive energy and appreciation. Choose to let your mood lead you forward, and it will.
Celebrate your uniqueness by expressing it in ways that add new and compelling richness to the world.
You deserve success, so go ahead and claim it as you work your way there. Give each thought, each decision, each action the benefit of confidence.
Today, your past is over and you are free to create a future based on your highest standards and most treasured dreams. Make that future the best it can be.
I’ll be the first to admit that the first time I heard of this, I was really frustrated and felt deprived. He stood there that morning and said we had to do this, write a blog, for 8 long weeks!!I had no idea how to do it, where to start and nevertheless what to write on, I mean I had some ideas and it’s something I’ve always wanted to do but not this way mister! Not as an assignment, a must have kind of thing, no way. I had done my research before but it was more of on my ‘to-do’ list , in one way or another this project has really helped me embrace my fears.
The fear of thinking I can’t write (I’m yet to confirm that by the way) I do it sometimes but usually it’s at the pleasure of my eyes and my eyes only, never for the public, its more of therapeutic and a let-out that is, some sort of a bin where all the trash is deposited. That’s what writing does for me,but now I had to step out of my zone and do it for the whole world to see. Honestly that was and still is my greatest fear, I’m just not ready to have everyone read and judge my skills per say, you know, and with this blog I’ve encountered some of that.
People I’d never expect bashed me on what I wrote on, sometimes I’d send my link to some of ya’ll and they’d be like, “Hey Rigoh , you write ? I didn’t know that”, so that was step one, the next step was for them to read and now say their on personal views and opinions. I gladly accepted the good and bad that came from you guys, I got inspired and really took that as a chance to realize where I’m going wrong or right, either way.
Others were the greatest support, ever reading my blog and gladly waiting each week for my next post, highly appreciated my people :). I don’t know what I would have done without all of you ( I think I’m gonna tear up- I’m a very emotional being for all who didn’t know) , you guys made me feel like I was not just wasting my time doing nothing here, but just knowing I was talking to just one person would have been enough, so thank you , again!
Oh and thank you to my followers from the far end of the world, people I don’t even know followed, commented and liked my blogs, from India and China of all places, it felt so good! I got chills every time I saw some strange name, oh how I’ll miss this.
Final remarks, for all who would like to start a blog its pretty easy , just go ahead and do it already, I know we got a whole lot of creative people out there. Write on what you’re passionate about and what makes you tingle when you think about it, let it be your fun escape route. Suddenly I feel like I’m an inspirational speaker on TED talk 😀
This being my last post, I don’t know whether I’ll do this again, what do you guys think? Oh well guess we’ll all have to just wait and see.
Almost forgot Happy New Month too , in three days but hey so what , have a great one!
The other day I was cooking and went a little bit overboard with the salt, I’m sure we all do so sometimes, its normal right? I know it is! Although Mama says it’s a generational problem with the ‘kids’ of these days.So it got me thinking on that Bible story on salt. Random, I know, but there’s really nothing to think about when you’re all alone in the kitchen bluntly waiting for the food to get ready. So usually I chose to think when bored, and that I did, and she came up.
I’m sure most of you have heard of the story on her, in the city of Sodom and Gomorrah who was turned into a pillar of salt , and well she died. If not, here’s a quick recap of it all, of how I remember it anyway. So there was this old man called Abraham married to Sarah, he had a nephew called Lot. Lot had a wife and two daughters. Something happened and you know, Lot and Abraham had to go separate ways and live separate lives.
Lot moved to some town , Sodom and Gomorrah. He and his family stayed there for a while and his daughters also got a chance to have men who pledged to marry them. Unfortunate or fortunate enough that didn’t end up happening. Apparently something happened and he had to run and disappear from that city, never to return since God was to destroy it because of the sexual immorality that existed. He sent burning sulfur and you know, people died , everything destroyed and nothing was left to existence.
Now that you get the whole story at least some bit of it, I’ll move on to what I was talking about.Lot’s wife.
She looked back and turned to salt remember ? I pointed that out up there. She looked back because it was her home , to her the immoral activities that everyone was engaged in might seem wrong to us but to her that was her life, to her that was the right way to live. She lived in pleasure but was dead as she lived. Many give reasons as to why she looked back but , she herself can give us the right answer to that. Till the end of eternity we will all be filled with perceptions and giving our own relative answers,but hey highly doubt there’s anyone who gives so much focus on her life.We don’t even know her name.
That’s how life is, I don’t entirely blame her for turning, trying to put myself in her shoes I’d turn too. Imagine being told to go forward, run and never look back , away from your home, your life, your past. Some may say its easy but to me that would be the hardest thing ever, because to me I feel the future is majorly influenced by how I was, particularly in the past.
I’m not trying to say she was right for doing it, but I’m also not saying she was wrong. She did it cause she felt she had to and I wouldn’t entirely blame her, owe unto her, too bad the consequences were that deep.
Anyway point is, your future is based on your past situations you cant really focus on the future and all that is to come if you can’t embrace who and what you were.
So do you, and as you get by don’t forget where you came from.
Its what made you.
“Friendship . . . is born at the moment when one man says to another
“What! You too? I thought that no one but myself . . . “
- S. Lewis. The Four Loves
Those are the exact words that rang in my head when I found my favourite friend. I say favourite because ordinarily I’d be forced to define what we have by particular adjectives that annunciate to words like closest friend or best friend perhaps less common a word like B.F.F. Funny how fast the word uncommon was lost to you once mentally those abbreviated letters sprang through your mind right? Personally I consider it a complete tragedy of catastrophic repercussions.
Anyway in a world full of people-pleasers, some people subconsciously seek out souls that are unafraid to cut through the crap and tell them exactly what they think of their choices. (Laughs) Striking how that sounds alike to a title sequence straight out of a star wars movie.
Now my friend serves part of that purpose so by definition we don’t have a conventional friendship. It’s not that kind of friendship where you call because you’re bored of perhaps seeking some sort of limited excitement. I have tonnes of people for that – ha. *Flashes introvert badge.* we only seek each other out when we want to scratch a relentless itch, when a topic of urgency or complete marvel rolls our minds. Like when I really need to talk, no small talk just endless talk about everything and nothing, the kind of conversation that writes books and paints pictures in your mind. Now that’s our version of fun. Contemporary it sounds like we are a serious lot but I can assure you we are not – just goofs stuck on inside jokes.
Now I couldn’t endlessly talk about a friendship without ultimately talking about the actual friend. So how do I describe her? After all, this was all about her, friendships do tend to mirror the faces and personalities involved, just not those that belong to us. They’re selfish that way. So again how do you start to describe an insatiable force of nature? I have to admit it’s close to impossible, after all friendship is the hardest thing in the world to explain, it’s not even something you learn in school, so am guessing a friend is like a close second, by relation anyway.
Now to get my friend you would have to get me first, see I am a creature of logic; all things argued on an emotional plain are almost always lost to me but argued upon my personality I still have my limitations. Although my logic seeps so thick, consider the datum that too many a time I have been deemed an alien but I am not above sparing people’s feelings and seeking emotion favourites.
So in relay she’s a number of things I am, perhaps a lot like a mental carbon copy. Definitely having acquired the Zen of their own existence and obviously written in a different ink. She’s in this thing where she’s at the best part of her life, no longer in conflict with her person.
It’s funny though considering the capacity I am acquainted with said soul there’s no way in the heaven above or hell below she’d admit to it. She’s funny that way. Perhaps it’s true what they say modesty does have its appeal I guess.
Well if the above doesn’t sail your boat perhaps you’d be more at home thinking of like a program on your computer or an app on your phone. Take Whatsapp for example, almost everyone has it. Well there’s the normal kind and Whatsapp Beta. Technically Beta isn’t the better version just less rigid, more flexible, she’s it, am the normal kind, there’s no way in hell you’re changing my colour.(Laughs) I have to admit that sounds a little sick but then again personalities are pretty much like any program. Weird? Well yeah but if really think about it, like really think deep, am not that wrong.
Apart from that, there’s this thing she does flawlessly. Walt Disney wrote a fairy tale about this beautiful princess whose mother died and father ended up remarrying, as it is tradition among his stories she was a wicked soul. The step mother that is. Now in this story the stepmother had this magical mirror which she queried about her beauty. Rather limiting questions if you ask me. A magical mirror and that’s the best she could come up with, really? I always pegged evil people as rather bright *sighs* Anyway any time she asked it would give her the right answer or at least the answer she wanted to hear, until it didn’t. Well am guessing by now the story has already sprang into mind. I think its Snow White but I couldn’t be sure with Disney Studios messing up every fairy-tale.
So back to my point, she’s a lot like that mirror she will tell you what you must hear, not what you want to hear. When she does not she’s still metaphorically acts like a mirror, reflecting your thoughts, a lot like talking to yourself but having the beautiful added insight of somebody else.
Now that’s as far as the similarities go, in plenty of aspects she’s completely different. Now having being so stuck on her intelligence initially, over time I spent enough time around her to come to realise just how much caring she was. Initially I was stuck on the notion that our friendship was a complete brain child of mental compatibility rather than intimacy. Don’t get me wrong I value her in plenty of ways that could be described as intimate. Then again the majority of our conversations do linger around the topics of intimacy. So if one takes enough time to listen to her the statures of her emotion show only by how she talks about the people in her life. Hell she will avoid putting it in the exact words but sieving through her normal a word, it’s almost next to impossible missing her various actions. She’s the kind of person who does stuff rather than talk about it. A lot like a doctor, who shows up every day, does his best to fix you but will never directly say get better. Now apart from that as far as character goes, she’s somebody who is respectful, responsible, down to earth, loyal, trustworthy – I should know the stuff I have told her I normally trade for souls, empathetic – kind of, not sure about that, I guess it depends but she’s definitely better than I am, independent and definitely driven. Open minded, almost forgot that – Now that’s one hell of a gem & she’s religious, God knows I personally struggle, am so out of it, don’t know why really but that’s one part of her am definitely jealous. Well she does have her concerns and questions but her roots run deep, super deep. Basically I could run with adjectives for a while before I maxed out everything.
Normally people leave the best part for last but I did mention am not everybody, I choose to writ e the boring part. Our meeting. Well it wasn’t so much an interesting affair, pretty much random I guess? Then again it depends if you’re a believer in fate. Am not , I hate the idea that my actions we predestined in any way but I rather enjoy the chaos theory; a branch of mathematics that deals with complex systems whose behavior is highly sensitive to slight changes in conditions, so that small alterations can give striking great consequences. Sounds a lot like a revolution of random events that ultimately ends up in fixed an occurrence described in a really complicated way. Worse if you ask me it just sounds like science trying to plagiarize fate out of its meaning. So nothing major happened, it wasn’t an unequal glamour like that of a born child and a mother, I believe it was somewhat like two born twins meeting. Complete Indifference. Alike to any meeting with a stranger it was lost to me.
Parting shot, like everything set against time, change is a necessary it didn’t take long to notice the quaintness, the differentiating characteristics, something along the lines of assertiveness and straightforwardness in the whole thing. So over time I might have become excited about this whole new thing in my life; so different, scratch that I was (that’s a lot coming from me; refer to introverted tendencies above – giggles). Still am really. Having had to settle in a generic society, with generic responses and generic answers refusing to live in their (humans) boxes and deemed weird, this change, this person was definitely my cup of tea. My normal for a change